Aunt Agony 041205

Originally posted by projectlime:
hey people...

i really got nobody to turn to. im really hoping all the fellow forum pals here can give me some advices..............

too cut the story short, i was wit this girl 2years ago. and of coz we broke up 2yrs ago. 2yrs later, we met and got into a relationship again.. at first, it really seems wow, the best love story every. breakup, without any contact, 2yrs later, contact back and get back together. really fall in love back again. (i noe it have happen before to others, but its just really 'wow' for me)

now, im beginnig to feel lesser feelings for her. no, i shouldnt say that. i mean, i dont really noe wat i feel now. but whenever i go out, i didnt think of her much. but i still check girls out and hopefully wanting to get to know some. i dont know whether its lust, or i really cant relate wit her and take it anymore. sometimes on the phone, we really dont have any idea at all wat to talk about!! maybe one of th reason is, we cant do alot of things together. and its really hard to communicate if ya dont really have anythin in common iwt that person.. yea? and also THE REAL PROBLEM IS, her family DOES NOT noe aabout our relationship and they cant! its the same 2yrs ago.. her parents are divorced n shes leavin wit her mom and sis. i understand especially wit this situation that the mom tend to be more protective. and of coz wit rship.. sayin theres no need to get into 1 at such a young age. shes gonna be 16 on 2006. lets dont talk about 2yrs ago but now. i been puttin it up wit it, acceptin the fact that we gotta be careful while we are out, HAVE to get back by 7pm. have to tell her sis or mom that shes goin out wit her GIRLfren..ALWAYS. ya noe, i really need a girl that can be there for me whenever i really need her. be there to pull me up when im down. and of coz ill be there for her no matter wat. my life aint that sweet and im still figurin shit out.. shes a beautiful beautiful girl, almost evey guys perfect girlfriend choice and i really fall in love wit her. but my feelings are all tangled up now. mixed feelings.. and, why will a normal man/guy like me still look at other chicks (sometimes less prettier) and tryin to know them when i already got a really pretty girlfren at home, who is all mine! i dont understand myself anymore.. sex is not reali importantt to me.. and yes, we did do all the things couples do before. so its really...... i dont know man. what should i do? i dont wana break up.. (im really afraid it gonna hurt us both, alot! rmber 2yrs ago we had some surreal love) but on the other end, im still like lookin out for chicks tryin to know some if possible. am i a physcho, lust for sex maniac or wat? (but i noe im not ah... haiz)

sorry if its too long. but please give me some positive. how long it is, i will read everythin. somethin positve please.. i will really ppreciate all your kind comments and reply here. thanks and have a ncie day. peace....


You are questioning your own agenda on why other woman could still interest you despite you being in a relationship and having a seemingly perfect girlfriend.

My question is 'why not?'

A perfect girlfriend... what is a perfect girlfriend? Is looks the measurement to a perfect girlfriend? Or is it personality? Or is it her contribution to the relationship?

In fact, its none of the above. A perfect girlfriend/boyfriend is a state of perception; you can have a gf that has 101% quality of a good girlfriend in the eyes of many, but because you measure with different yardstick, emotionally, it isn't... despite being yes logically.

Why did you patch back? Are you sure is Love and not because of a certain regret that this relationship ended (2 years ago) due to some reasons and you felt that it could actually last (or generate more fulfilment) longer than expectation? Your attempt to patch effectively means that you are turning your shoulder once again... and looking back usually equips with certain profound truth.

You are coming clean with yourself emotionally: reason to accept this relationship may not be Love and as time passed, we evolved. The same old her back then, may be quite different now... even though she may look the same. And the old factors that you subconsciously detested, (i.e seemingly underground relationship) surface once again.

Let me take a calculated shot: isn't this part of the reason why this relationship failed in the past? Those issues which you have mentioned? I am quite sure none of these thingy improve very much since then.

Having similar constants and variables... albeit it comes in different aesthetic package. But sad to say, the new aesthetic component has very little lasting effect. Subconsciously, you are teleported two years back, but emotionally, you may not have realise, during this two years... you have actually moved quite abit... far enough to realise that looking back could be a mistake afterall.

Time heals... and it actually heals and level you up to such extend that people of the past shouldn't even have any relationship-dealing with you. Your freewill accepted the proposal, so now you face your own confusion.

P.S: There isn't anything wrong in checking other woman out. But it is indeed a problem when it becomes a complication to you, because you know yourself better than I do. Do take some time off to think review your relationship and most importantly, yourself. You don't want to drag on a relationship just because you don't want history repeats without the right reason to remain in them. Simply because if you don't have the right reasons to remain in them, it will end when your emotional balloon burst and reality slaps at your face.

Are you a Leo?

Cheers