Aunt Agony 311006

Originally posted by uglypig:
Hi everyone,

I called myself uglypig, because he always say i ugly and look like a pig. I not those pretty girl lah, that why call myself ugly pig.

SOrry that my english not that good, hope everyone willing to read my story. Although it is just a normal story. :(

On 4 Oct 2006, my bf (now is my ex bf) msg me in the morning say he want to break up with me, he say our thinking is different. I do not what he suddenly say our thinking is different. When he msg me, i really do not know what to do. I cry when i was working. Luckily boss not around or else i dun know how to face him. Cry so loudly, heart so pain. Together with him for 3 years 7 months and 12 days, then he say our thinking is different. What shit is this. Anyone can tell me. Why why why??? why it happen to me? He is my first love, i love him so deeply, give him whatever he want. But in the end, i get what is return. He just left me like that. Only give me one reason which is thinking different. F**K

Now still thinking of him, but no use. He say we only can be friends, cannot patch back anymore. Cry Cry. No use liao. No matter how much tears i drop, he also dun even bother to care about me anymore. Last sat, i think of him so msg him, asked him what he doing. He say he going to sleep liao, just finish doing duty. I asked him whether he got new gf liao ma? He reply say got, sleeping now. I cried, he say sleeping now. Just know the girl for one week already is gf and sleeping together. Why. Why he can changed his heart so fast. Forget about our 3 years relationship in a short time. Do i mean nothing to him, am i just a tool to him, play finished then say break up. I know he break up with me because of a girl. Maybe he tired to see me anymore. Sad cry.. want to die.....

I and him seldom quarrel one, why suddenly say changed then changed. WHY?

Why a relationship will just end like this? Why a guy can change so fast? Did they ever care about how the girl will feel? Do they know they hurt the girl heart? Why guys give up on one relationship so easily? Why guys can start another relationship so fast?

I very closed to my parent and my sister one. My sister now taking O-level so i dun want her to pei wo. But when i need her, she still willing to go out with me. haha. not all my friend got bf, but they also have their other friends. I dun like to go out with friends one, i only go out with best friends. Those seldom contact already, they would not bother me one lah.

Anybody can help me? I feeling like dying.......... :cry:

Thank you


People don't change overnight; it just that people change without your knowledge over the time. It may felt like a sudden quake, but behind that disaster lingers some old time-cumulative frustration and dissatisfaction. Having little quarrel doesn't always mean that the relationship is promising - it may suggest a harmonious relationship, but can we always take it at face value and presume that all is well... or perhaps we are deluded that all is well?

It gets very questionable when partners make unconstructive remarks like 'you are damn ugly' kind of statement because it really wonders what he actually feels inside of him (it would be a little different if he actually give constructive advices like how to go about doing it). I recalled an old theory in CloUdiSm - about this phenomenon of human going after the lesser, in search for the better, because there wasn't any other (Riding the donkey while searching for the horse). And your man seemed to fit perfectly in this description for at that period of time when he was chasing you (it's applicable as well if you are doing the chasing instead), it is likely that you are the only candidate and he probably accepted it because there wasn't any other better choices.

Of course, he has tried loving you in the process, which give the relationship a longer lifespan, but it died with an encounter of a third party, which you probably never even knew about her existence until the relationship is pronounce dead.

Love don't change, just that expectation changes with time, as needs not satisfied breeds frustration.

For the benefit of a relationship, it is paramount to have life outside the life of your relationship - having to forsake everyone else (and probably limits that to best friend/s and boyfriend) is doing the relationship more harm than good. Man gets tired much more easily having a woman constantly lingering onto them for accompaniment and woman receive a harder punch trying to recover their fall after losing their relationship.

Somehow, it seemed to me that you have a complacent nature - you are easily satisfied and prefer to maintain status quo than having to initiate action/s to work on what's lacking, both in yourself and probably the relationship. I mean if the break up was so unexpected and contradict the reality in your fairyland you have been believing all these while, there should be more hidden closet not known or spoken to you - about him, his love and the relationship.

Take this time off to explore your potentials. Everyone has the power to change the 'not so pleasant' aspect of their life. If I was you, I would channel this previous relationship into energy to reform myself.

You may begin your first step by changing your nick. If you cannot even convince yourself that you have the prerogative to a better relationship... for somebody better to appreciate you, you will probably repeat history. Your nick degrades your esteem and you will appear to people how your esteem appears to you.

Lastly, don't always pray for a good man... a good relationship to befall on you, trust me you don't want to know how foolish that sort of thinking is.

Don't take chance - always take calculated risk. Empower your life by making resolution to evolve yourself.

Cheers