Aunt Agony 211005

Originally posted by ahkico:
Pls help!

No no.. Is certainly not MI!!! If my guy see tis.. I'll get it from him liao.. ;)

I've tis gd friend.. Her bf is.. Well.. Ok ok lah.. Doesn treat her too well.. @ 1st he has some other gals behind her back.. Kinda flirtin ard.. But then stop le..

Jus came out from N.S.. Started workin.. Since then.. He'll always have no time.. Whole dae not even a msg from him.. Can last for few daes..

They also funny de.. Can break patch break patch..

My tis friend.. She got to noe tis guy.. Whom to her.. Is absolutely wonderful! 2 her..

But he's married!!! :twisted:

They noe each other for erm.. mayb 3 mths bah..
They sorta went on dates? It first started when they meet for lunch tog.. and they kissed.. and then.. gd nite darlin..

i keep remindin her.. HE IS MARRIED WITH A KID!!! she noes.. say doesn expect anythin.. but he is so unlik her bf.. so caring, gentle. nice... etc..

I already goin lose my top liao!!

I told her everythin i could think off.. Wat retribution, u wouldn wan ur guy nx time to treat u tis way.. Tat now he's sweet.. but His wife surely will find out.. then quarell.. and then he'll tak it out on u..

The longer u got tog, the more u will expect.. then u can't date openly.. got to hide hide.. end up hurt is u.. stand to lose also the gal onli..

he isn a gd guy.. if can have affair behind his wife.. he isn a faithful guy.. etc..

i mangage to persuade her to last msg le.. she says ok ok..

but.. i asked her again.. she say meetin him for breakfast tomorrow..

haiz.. i reali dun feel lik botherin anymore.. told her reali shld last le.. then at most msg onli then stop.. but.. i don think it will end..

it isn my rite to stop her from doin wat she wants.. she says let her enjoy the care for a few more daes.. i'm fraid she will end up hurt.. and the guilt.. if it goes on.. OMG..

Any advice?

Any thing i can do to stop her?

:


It is a mutual exchange of emotional needs, based on fourth Law of Love - CloUdiSm. (We attract qualities that we exude). Allow me to refer to 1bigmess case on my reply in 041005

Allow me to quote one section which I had written:

[quote]Originally posted by yunhaier:
...I have seen so many cases, where a person who cannot commit often find himself/herself being in situation where he/she will attract partners that is unavailable themselves. We attract qualities that we exude (This being Fourth Law of Love - CloUdiSm) Because you cannot commit due to your then-marriage when you scandal first begin two years back, you are such a perfect candidate for a relationship with him because he is seeking for people who cannot commit and at the time, you are simply just that. Look at him! He is also involved with another girl, who is unavailable (being attached)... and therefore I am not even surprised when you relate that part of the story....[/quote]

***

In similar case, all thoughtful words from you will likely to have no effect on her. There is an emotional NEED... somewhat like when you are hungry, you will simply just eat the expired bread because you are hungry. Hunger is a NEED - until your health suffered and probably get food poisoning or diarrhea, you wouldn't bother. Reason being: it still tasted fine.

So what your friend is attached? His boyfriend isn't giving her what she needs emotionally and if that man could fill in the gap, she will probably think - why not? This is an important element why people choose to accept potential misery even knowing that they are playing with fire. They always thought that they have the power to control the flames, end up, realising it became a huge conflagration that got out of hand.

***

Something to share:

I kinda 'allowed' my best friend to mingle with this married man (with kid), who is her current bf. His marriage was long gone and my best friend's appearance is like the catalysis. At first, it was a flirty play thing, but obviously, I know better and advised against it. But when you realise, warning means nothing to people with deep emotional emptiness... I did what I always do - to let karma teach her.

'... Do what you will... I can only try to catch you when you fall...'

We all must walk the route our destiny has in store for us. This is the path to enlightenment - if people has to go through certain karmic debts, so be it. I am not God, I cannot change what God has for her. I can only offer my views on issues and then my shoulder if things goes wrong and she comes back crying. And if she found what she seek, I will be happy for her. (She is currently very happy in that relationship for she just had a jerk guy in a five years BGR)

P.S: CloUdiSm Law of Alpha Omega overrides everything single law in CloUdiSm. (If all else fail, follow your heart).

Cheers