Aunt Agony II 170805

Originally posted by TidusX:
To anyone whose reading this long problem of mine, whether u got an answer to my problem or not, i really appreciate ur effort. Thank you very very very much...

I'm a poly student and i got to know this girl around end of january. we started off well and got close to each other pretty soon. i could tell that she was intrested in me becoz i asked certain qus and her reply was obvious. there was once she was sick but insisted on going somewhere far for dinner with me... but i did not tell her abt my feelings becoz i wanted to get closer to her and then reveal my feelings. i thought this would ensure i could get her.

However as time passes, she got colder towards me. despite sacrificing alot of time for her and showering her with gifts. her time is spent on her other friends, guys and girls. instead of me. i couldnt take it anymore and i revealed my feelings for her. she then said she knew this was coming and she didnt wanted to be in a relationship. her actions before were very much showing she was intrested in me...

but god knows when she started changing and before i could realise it, she was treating me like a normal friend. she treats her friends very well, so i often got mistaken. but there is the difference in ur actions if u're intrested in someone or u're treating ur friend well. and i could tell that difference.

we arent as good as before but i've always been very dedicated to her and i never asked for her to sacrifice anything back. i just hope she could accept me... but she never did. i used to have academic and sports excellence but its now deterioating... i'm considered an achiever, and my performance now is really a big disaster. i just cannot focus on anything i do... still, my mind is sticking onto her...

i often miss her very much. every moment. the last thing before i sleep i think of her... so is the first thing i thought of when i wake up... i go to sch, listening to class, walking, eating, playing... virtually everything i do, she's in my mind... i've let her know abt how i missed her, but she doesnt have any response to it... she never reveals her feelings for me whether she likes me or not even though i asked her. if she doesnt, why not just tell me and let me give up. if she does, why not let me know and be with me... i used to msg her everyday and when sometimes she msgs me first... but she doesnt now. and i tried not msging her for a week and she doesnt even bother to msg me! she's now with another guy friend and she seems to be in good terms with him...

i'm feeling really bad and i dont know what to do. i've been telling myself to give up on her but i just couldnt do it. i've told myself to go for her one last time, if it doenst work out well, then lets forget it... but everytime it worked out somewhere in the middle. not bad and not good. i just dont know wat to do now... the worst feeling is when u're not very good with her, and not too bad, hanging somewhere in the middle... we used to be very good... but now we're not... someone please tell me what should i do...


She already state that she prefer to be single. She acknowledge your liking for you, but retain silence regarding her feelings.

IMHO, you are treading on very dangerous terrain. Dangerous, not as in life-threatening kind; more like every slight movement would create a chain of reaction. She probably holds some kind of feelings for you, but it isn't strong enough to justify a relationship. There could be some unseen body language or situation that took place and she deemed it as either anti-seductive (minus marks) or unsuitable.

It's great when you have the fighter spirit to try and win the affection of your Love, but knowing your circumstances is critically essential. You can't just fight to win your way out, thinking that if you don't do it now, everything will be gone forever. This is precisely the kind of mindset that sets to deteriorate your relationship with her and tighten the intensity. Isn't it... like now?

If you could hear the stand in her heart, you would hear things like 'Sigh... I already told him that...'

You may not need to give up, but certainly, you need to take step one HUGE step back and retrace your route. To bash up a wall literally is incredibly foolish, thinking that you would break it down and advance forward. Move backwards and do some observation first. It would enlighten your mind because you begin to understand more. Eventually whether you feel you want to respect her decision or not... by then, you should have a rough idea.

Cheers