Monday, August 01, 2005

Aunt Agony 010805

Originally posted by soulness:
normally if a guy troubled, we say taht there are only 2 possibilities

its either regarding (i)career/money or (ii)woman/relationship

so which one do u think is more important to u? why?

one of my fren once told me that guy can only be troubled by career matters not girls.. if ur gfs/wives is givng u problem then its an indication that the relationship is not healthy. in order not to allow it to afffect ur career, u shld come out of the relationship and proceed to the next girl..

sound abit mcp right? haha well wat u ppl think? share some of ur thougth here pls :)



Everything is integrated into matters of Love, directly or indirectly, but how much priority and percentage it stands, it depends largely on the individual. Some people cannot 'survive' very long without some form of relationship - especially Libra. Some people can probably sacrifice alot of their relationship, for good or ill, especially Pisces. And the list goes on.

I feel that the emphasise on money in Singapore is kinda OVER-emphasise.

Don't get me wrong, money is indeed an important aspect in a relationship. But somehow man have this biased preception that with money and car, everything just come smoothly or easily.

This is a load of bullsh!t.

And very often, you read the papers and probably hear stories from your friends: couples fighting over wealth and over their falling marriage. This happens even to people who ain't very rich. I am so sure of this: generally, these people do hold such mindsets in their definition - the overly materialistic views on love. Marriage fails for MANY reasons, but for wealth wrestle and tussle, it makes you wonder it's for love or money.

You see, guys who don't have much wealth to sell themselves to potential gf/wife KNOWS that they ain't rich and if the ladies are materialistic themselves, they wouldn't end up with them. There are few exceptions to this (regarding materialistic wife/gf and poor guy): very common scenario includes

I) Dating since school days - reality makes a person evolve, when one steps into society.

II) Marriage that are NOT based on love - many thingy falls under this category. Shotgun... paid foreign bride, etc.

Because 'poor guys' are poor, they make-up for the lack of wealth by being more loving and all positive aspects in a relationship, while those who revel in overly-materialistic views on love tends to substitute wealth for love, affection and all positive aspects in a relationship. (A rich guy probably have no qualms about spending big money to buy expensive gifts, treats and such - but is every girl looking for such extravagant enjoyment? Taurus, Capricorn and Virgo probably yes. And having a scenario to say sorry probably equal to a Tiffany ring, flowers and everything. Meaningless when you substitute material things for behavior and actions that needs no pricetag. It's definitely a useful tool, but guy with wealth tends to depend on it so much, that it will have declining impact with more similar usage).

Poor guys (inclusive of self proclaim ones) needs that shang jing xin - someone who has goal, works towards them and achieve it gradually. When your motivation to succeed in life and career is driven by love's desire, you will find yourself doing better. You may not earn a five figure monthly sum, but it makes meaning to the existence of your relationship, constantly warding off the challenges put forth and I am sure with all the efforts and correct mindsets, you will survive decently, financially. Do you know how powerful your mind, heart and soul put together is? I was taught by a few gurus when I was very young (Late Primary) and I seen how powerful this combination will transform a human. Guys with shang jing xin are very charming, however, sad to say, a general group of 'poor guys', who doesn't have this quality, laments and blame that it is because they are 'poor', thus the reason for their current state.

Again, excuse or seriously the ultimate truth?

Remember the message you are sending your Love is not wealth - it's how you are working for your relationship - the effort input. I remember my ex-marketing lecturer used to tell me 'People don't buy products, people buy benefits.' I don't understand what he meant until much later - E.g. when you are hungry, at home and all the food stores are quite a distance away from you, you will probably call Pizza Hut or any delivery service NOT because you want to eat their food, rather you buy the quality of 'Convenience'. It makes sense because it is relevant.

P.S: When you put relevance in Love, it makes your relationship invincible because you harmonized it with reality and love's idealogy and belief. You know and do what's working for your relationship and you bring out the 'Giving' element to it's fullest.

Cheers

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