Aunt Agony IV 160805

Originally posted by MidiLand:
Hey there, my gf's ex called her EVERYDAY! and when she doesn't pick up his call, he will question WHY! and my gf is kinda scared of him.. i juz feel that he is so rude to her, EVEN me myself can't bear myself to do tat! And sometimes he will go to her place, and put smth on her table ( coz her windows is nv lock but gt grill la..) Been keeping quiet bout it but the more i keep quiet, the miserable i tend to be.. any suggestion for me?


Why must your gf respond to him?

He probably in state of denial; thinking that he still have hopes with her.

And because she responded to him, be it negative/positive, he took it as a respond, which means he probably have a slight chance to get back to her.

This guy is probably a little extreme: I have three unorthodox levels, increasing in intensity.

I) Let her have one final talk with him. Let them settle this themselves. She has to let him know that they are OVER and it's IMPOSSIBLE for them to be together because she NO LONGER loves him. There will probably be strong resistance and conflicts, therefore it is advisable to meet in the day instead of night. She make her ideas known to him, and tells him that if she feels harassed again, byebye - level two is activated. (This is positive)

II) Complete ignore. No respond of ANY kind, even if he threaten suicide. He place his gift, it is left at where it is. Tell all your family and whoever, that nobody is suppose to touch that thingy and instruct to leave it where it is. This should settle it, if not... (This is neutral)

III) Extreme. Maintain level two, just that she become extreme and seek ways to destroy that ego of his. Smash his present outside the house and leave it that way. Still avoid contact and if circumstances is such that she has to speak, employ strong body and verbal language to fight her way through. (This is negative)

You should also give her some time to get through this mini drama. Don't pressure her to solve everything; the issue here is WORK TOGETHER to end this drama. She is probably trying to do her own method, but if it doesn't work, it is time to come together and find some solution mutually

Cheers