Aunt Agony III 061105

Originally posted by Airbus330Captain:
Thanks for your advices guys .. .

Well , all I can say is that I can imagine both of us being together happily , having a family together. I havent had that feeling for a long time. I ask you guys a question. If you see someone who is already attached (and the bf is someone you know as a friend) but you have strong feelings for her , what will you do ? Wait for her to break off depending on how strong their relationship are ? Forget it and move on or confess to her hoping that a miracle will happen ?

I believe love is selfish but what I really believe that even if I like her but she doesnt like me , love cannot be forced and if i really love her , I should be happy for her happiness, that is how I feel.


I know many people explains it this way, but technically speaking, this is a contradiction. If you believe that Love is selfish, you will not understand what is mutual respect and empathy for the woman you loved because selfishness only understand a self absorbed form of happiness (read Ayukat).

You are suffering heavy conflicts with the mind and heart; with one telling you to pursue your heart's desire and another reminding you about moral, ethics, conscience, norms, standards, etc.

I believe in all is fair in Love and War (with the exception of married potential for a married potential is much more complicated and definitely karmic). To me, being attached signified nothing, apart from trying to know each other better. BGR is indeed a 'get-to-know-more' about each other stage - even if your relationship is of many years. I have a known friend who realise that he knew so little about his gf... even after a 5 years relationship - especially the 'new' her. He was having a crisis of his own and only then, what he thought is either based on assumption or the past.

Time changed... people changed.... No one is the same one year back - we all evolved with time.

Do you gamble... say BlackJack? Do you ever realise that regardless of how your luck is like (good or bad), you will never raise above this particular amount of stake?

In your case, the stake is on a friendship.

Are you comfortable with this stake? Comfortable playing?

P.S: Love is sacrificial - best of both worlds normally don't exist in Love.

Cheers