Aunt Agony II 080905

Originally posted by JuzMy2Cts:
hi all,

Its my first post and i'm sorry if i'm a trouble to anyone of you guyz and galz here...

Been together with my gal for about a year and a half now... had our share of laughter and quarrels... but its always the humouring her part that she always deem me a failure in... why is it that other guys know how to humour their gf and yet you don't know? why is it that after your previous relationships and yet you don't know what humouring a gal is all about?

Seriously i believe i do try too... but i feel its just not in my nature or genes... imo i always feel that sweet talking guyz are a$$ hxlez in my eyes... i dont mind talking with gentleness but when it comes to nice words, my brain is totally dry... for eg, during an outing, she was venting her frustrations at work at me, she nagged at me when i parked my car slightly further away from the lift area when plenty of nice empty slots are present, she slammed my door and waited outside, when i am done i tried to offer to take her stuff for her but she ignored me and simply walked off, i know it was raining outside the building and i rushed back to get the umbrella for her but when i returned she got angry with me instead that i didnt bother to humour her even though i know she's angry???? OMG it was only a few minutes and seriously in my mind i was trying to conceive my humour plan... do all gals think that humour plans comes like oxygen in the air??

other times when she's angry, i try to pick up a light topic, she seem to completely ignore me and reply in short words... yes... no... not sure... i do admit at times on phone conversation i tend to keep quiet especially when we quarrel... and i know she dont like it... but its not that i find it fun to do that... she just get flared up so easily... when we quarrel i prefer to keep my own cool and let she do all the verbal screaming she wants... imo when two quarrels, one side should always stay cool to allow true problem solving...

i really don't know... can anyone in this world tell me what is humouring a gal? how do i get the wu lin mi ji to learn this technique? why cant she understand that? is it a must for guys to know this? if you ask me if i had similar problems with my past relationships in this i will say no... simply because imo my ex gfs' so called expectations of a guy humouring a gal is a simple sorry, gentle, warm and teasing her with some cuddlings... is there really more to this?

at this very moment she's telling not to talk to her until i learn how to humour a gal... i feel i can do well in all exams as i used to but this is one paper i seriously have no confidence in...

Sorry if i took too much of your tme reading this, i really need some opening to talk it out...


To me, it's not so much about humouring your gf when she is in a bad mood; It's more about her attitude and her expectation of you. When she entered into a relationship with you, the kind of character she has readily accepted to be her boyfriend (I presumed there was a decent amount of time spent together before a BGR was born between you two), is something that she already knew. By requesting strongly something that is so unlike you, she is beginning to evolve you from different angles. This is a natural process of couple-ship for we subconsciously influence each other.

Somehow, her attempt is done based on self centric effect. All about 'I, Me and Myself.'

It's good to know how to handle your gf when she isn't particularly in a good mood, but there is a difference between bad mood and bad attitude. Having a bad mood doesn't automatically produce bad attitude - such personality is innate.

Cheers