Aunt Agony 310106

Originally posted by bladez87:
ok i was chasing a girl.
her friends told me i was too rush.
like always i didnt know what was too rush.
now that i realised it. it is too late.
just a while ago, her friend gave me the most obvious hint.
she suggested that i talk to the girl face to face.
there are somethings her friend cannot say out.
her friend also invited me to her house on sat.
the girl is going too.
she said i had best talk to her after sat. take things slow and easy.
or else sat when i go, things will get very awkward.

ok. guys, time to teach me how to save this rushed courtship.

thanks...this girl means quite alot to me. i have done things i never done before for her. now that i realised this. i regret being so hasty.



CloUdiSm speaks about Morning Foundation; referring to relationship born on weak 'materials' prepared hastily. The relationship is extremely raw and vulnerable, even to a scratch and is usually caused by Uranus transiting effect.

I recommend setting your pace slower, but not abandoning the initial drive completely because chances are, it will have adverse effect if you jam brake. In simple, don't pause and give her all the freewill and space, instead give allowance, but maintain your stand. In reality, this 'mistake' is pretty fatal because even if you succeeded in getting her, negative unseen effect will spill over into your BGR. You don't really experience this negativity head-on, rather, it is likely be a highest common factor that give rise to later conflicts and issues.

Go with the plan; meet up at your friend's house (and especially watch your body language: Don't be so eager - don't gaze, but maintain good friendship contact. Care physical distance - don't avoid, yet don't hang too close). Plan what you want to say to her. Here are some pointers to take note:

I) Don't get too emotional. Wild emotions are like untamed stallions - they are dangerous. Judging you from my perspective, you are probably someone who can't control emotions well, so don't get into a situation where you get all emotional and loses your position. You must control your stance properly if you hope to achieve anything.

II) Less of 'Me' and more of 'You' type of communication. Yes, I know you love her, etc - but it's all self absorbed. You must devise a way to allow her (even if it is only an illusion) to think that she has some freewill in making decisions and that the choice she make (which is you) is a good decision BECAUSE you made her feel that it it will be.

Basically, your 'hard selling' must succeed in persuading her.

III) State timing to counter indecisiveness. If you sense that she is backing out with confusion, put time into the picture. (E.g. Yes, we understand that things are getting too fast, we shall give ourselves another 30 days to decide).

Knowing how to sell is useless if you don't know how to close the deal.

Cheers