Originally posted by papercut87:
date a guy who is very nice and caring to you but the only thing u cannot tolerate is his vulnerability and sensitivity? like he gets emo, jealous and hurt very easily (not angry) over small issues or things you say... whereby sometimes u dont even know that u've hurt him..
because of that, he thinks alot and gets really depressed after that... and comes pouring everything out to you.. and u have to listen him out. in summary, its always the girl who is stronger (emotionally) and the one comforting the guy..
but other than that.. he's seems pretty ok.... like he has pretty gd qualities of a partner.. how? :? guys, is it normal to be like that?
I think it's immaterial with regards to the gender or the susceptibility of being emotional - in fact when you meet guys like these, it's always the definition of love that spur people to behave in certain manner. Certainly, our blueprint in love and its development conceive this definition, but in return, our definition of love will strengthen and reiterate how we express our behaviour and affection.
It is a skintight connection.
Humans are emotional - everybody is. The only difference lies with the degree of how overwhelming our emotions are in taking charge of our life. Love specifically touches this very deep aspect of our emotions on a profound level and if one's emotional development is screwed and especially if his/her perception is warped in love - chances are, he will transform into a man or woman you have mentioned in your post.
Lack of self evolution, understanding and wisdom (topped with the existence of abundance fear) will drive people to accept possessiveness, extreme jealousy and exert control as the key to 'secure' (what they reckon) the 'things' that belongs to them. Love is always freedom and freewill - our human intervention always produces a Touch-Of-Death, thinking that we can halt love from slipping away.
It never worked.
Love is never tangible - ironically, the more they accept these hogwash definitions, the less fulfilling their relationship will be and the more likely it is for them to destroy their own relationship with their bare hands eventually.
And the cycle will repeat until their karma and cosmic lessons whipped them into realization. Of course, realization never come to some people - which is why some will never come to understand Love beyond their closed minded perception, even till his/her deathbed.
Sometimes I find it laughable and dismaying, simultaneously, when I speak to people and discovered that the gist of the conversation seemed to suggest that their self worth & meaning of existence can only be validated through the existence of their Love relationship. And I will hear of all their emotional justification:
I) The prerogative for emotional dependency & self pity.
II) The need for excessive attention.
III) Unrealistic emotional demands that will not be able to sustain itself over a vast period of time.
They probably thought that having no BGR relationship is probably the closest resemblance of having no life. That intrinsically suggests that the person probably has very weak outlook in life & love and never believe that self love must come BEFORE love.
Like two pillars supporting a structure - if one pillar is merely leeching strength from other to be around, then surely, it will be draining for the other pillar and wouldn't be long before the whole structure collapse because this is often an unrealistic model in Love.
I cannot comprehend how, without first having that self love and seeking our identity, could one even move along the higher learning of Love? It's ridiculously simple - one, being a stranger to himself, wants to know a stranger better than himself?
No wonder divorce rate are climbing and people are indulging into nugatory relationships, only to spilt for the SAME underlying reasons over and over again. This whole distorted perception and corrupted attitude towards themselves hardly differs very much towards their relationship.
Cheers
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