Aunt Agony 040906

Originally posted by jeramy:
Many people say, in a relationship, you should let you partner know what you are feeling, and should not bottle up, lest all the negative feelings explodes into a firey furball when a quarrel entails. Communication between a couple was the key.

Yesterday, I told my gf that I felt she was neglecting me over the past few weeks on the phone. Throughout the conversation, I never once pointed the blame at her, and stated again and again that I'm just letting her know my feelings.

My tone was calm and composed, and never did I flare up or whatever, I was as normal as I can be.

In the end? Her reaction?

She just told me she agrees with me that she had been neglecting me, and that it was ALL HER FAULT. I said I told her all that not to find fault with her or what. Nobody is right or wrong in a relationship.

Then she stated again she feels guilty, and again and again keep emphasizing its ALL HER FAULT. ALL HER FAULT. It has nothing to do with me. Its HER FAULT.

Finally, she gave me the one time jialat-jialat ->

‘I NEED SOME TIME TO THINK ABOUT US…’

Yes man. I've done it again, messed it all up again. What the hell?

Communication?

It has only left me facing an imminent break-up once again.

NOW TELL ME WHOEVER SAID COMMUINICATION WAS IMPORTANT????


Communication is paramount.

Chances are, your relationship is already degenerating. The opening up of inner feelings merely reveal the large extend of decomposition taking place inside your love unconsciously.

So you were thinking that if you didn't talk about it, you wouldn't break up and things will remain as it is?

You rather love a facade than attempting to grasp something real? Although you risk losing the relationship, at least you know you are not loving a mask. There is so much narcissism in your thoughts that love to you probably divide itself between having and losing it. Losing a relationship doesn't mean you lose all your chips - it only means you have lost some chips in one bet.

If it happens three times, chances are, the problem lies with you. Remember, the women you meet are variables - you are the constant. If all three variables face the same issues, you must evolve if you desire to see changes.

I do not encourage partners to be overly emotional and clingy (Cancer, Scorpio, Pisces). Because I believe most people are emotional with tint of depression/self pity/negative sort. The archetype of the partners they would attract often (1) reflect their own personality, (2) breeding persona to fulfill karmic obligation (3) call from the soul to evolve oneself.

Yours probably fall under (3) as the woman you attract, always seemed to flee from you. Your overwhelming emotional touch on them causes them to escape.

You may think that having another woman like yourself would patch this wrecked characteristic of yours in love. Although it may be true to certain extend, it will also create much intensity and the growth of your relationship would be minimal. CloUdiSm states that not everybody requires higher wisdom in love. [Six level of Love Maturity; theory of Infant (Aries representation) - Adult (Virgo representation). Using Maslow Needs to explain my jargon, it is possible, in love, that people are satisfied with just Physiological & Safety needs and requires nothing more. Because they reckon they requires nothing more, they choose not to pursue higher enlightenment, unlike the original theory, where it is believed that people will attempt to pursue higher level of needs whenever their current level is satisfied].

I repeat - communication is paramount.

And it is your mission to uncover the ‘real culprit’ responsible for the death of your relationship.

The 'real culprit' is probably someone else - communication is innocent.

Cheers