Aunt Agony 250808 II

Originally posted by Julynn83:

It's been nearly a year since we broke off. But i am still struck here on the same point where he left me.

He gave me all sorts of reason saying that he wants a breakup pushing all the blame to me. 2days later when i went to look for him again to try and save our relationship, i saw a lovebite on his neck. That kind of pain in my heart was undescrible. He already has a new gf.

The reason we quarrel and ended breaking up was because i found out that he have been chatting with this gal. I didnt expect things to turn out like that. Moments before we quarrel he was still lovingly holding my hand.

Being with him for 4 and a half year. We have even thought of starting our own family. We have even went to apply for a flat together. Little did i expect him to have a change of heart. Just moments after he break off with me. Maybe 4 years plus wasn't long but we have gone through so much ups and downs together, how would a guy say forget, let go and leave just like that?
He's happily with the gal now but here i am couldnt move on. I thought i had already let go.

Trying not to think but he kept calling me and ask me out. He doesnt have any intention in patching back. He just need someone's accompany when his gf is working. His calling and all, triggered the love i had for him that i had all along tried to hide and not to think, i kept telling everyone that i am oki and i have already forgotten him. In fact, i am just lying to myself.

I cried everytime i think of him, everytime i thought of all our memories, all the promise that he has once made, everytime when i passby the places we have went to before. There is so much so much memories everywhere.

I wanted to move on and forget about him but i just couldnt stop thinking. I donno if i am still waiting for him to come back. I am so confused myself. What a useless gal.





You attempt to use credits of the past to justify harboring excessive emotions into the now-defunct relationship. In Love's concept of time (CloUdiSm - Law of Time), I quote: 'What's dead cannot be revived and what's revived will not be original. What's original will be in the past and what's passed will remain dead.'

Death is often misunderstood - often liken to a form of some massive evil that lurks in dark, abominable to all existence. In fact, it's like an entrance; when one pushes the door, the other side appeared to be pulling - creating one-effect-two-perception situation. This simple relation between life and death in relationship is but our quintessential cosmic growth that expands our higher learning in Love. Neither existence nor non-existence of a relationship contributes to the success/failure of relationship; it's merely a continuous process.

In fact, throughout the lifespan of a relationship - it could gone through several process of 'death and rebirth', as Love evolved through the vicissitude of their relationship, shaped by the couple themselves.

Nobody says it's easy to move on; but the difference lies in our concept of acceptance, as well as our grieving process. Those that deny their circumstances often find it a struggle to cope with the demands of reality against incongruous delusion that they are trying to upkeep. Many times, the delusion is inherent and self generated, as our false belief strengthen to corroborate with the lies we have gorged ourselves till the point of insanity.

You perpetually questioned yourself with all the mundane 'why', which incarcerate you with heaps of nonsense and fettered you from moving on. Allow me to shatter some zealous beliefs you have held so dearly - why must a four-and-a-half years of relationship be of something to him as well?

You must understand that this value, in which you have emotionalize, is exclusive to your own personal belief and does not necessarily means the same on his side. His action suggested a strategy of hook-bait-reel-release technique in retention initiative and if you are foolish enough to buy the tale of the 'I-like-the-other-woman-but-I-love-you' crap - then don't weep if you ultimately realize the poignant truth that could ruin all good memories, which is probably all you have left right now.

You cannot judge the future based on the rules of the past. You will always be miserable if you cling onto expired game rules that disallow you to unlock your gate to freedom.

To move on, you don't have to run. You just need to draw your first step.

Start walking: a step in a day will mean ten steps in ten days and a hundred steps in a hundred days.

Remember, we are responsible for our own happiness and misery. If you choose to dwell, nobody can coerce you to climb out, other than yourself.

Cheers