Aunt Agony II 301111

Originally posted by risou:

I'm 29 now, she's 27.

I was there for her when she broke up with her ex (of 7yrs), 3.5yrs ago. I was there when she decided to change her job, when her favourite pet died, when she got a chronic illness and got depression due to that. I did everything I could to make her feel loved, to be one to solve her problems, to travel via cab when going out because she needs alot of rest, because she gets fatigued easily, leading to more pain. To accompany her even if it meant travelling to and fro, myself often reaching home late.

She struggled with her pain and depression, when nobody seemed to understand what it means to be in her shoes. It is tough on her. I thought I was on the right track or at least was close to it.

She ended the r/s a month ago. Her friends and colleagues and mum and doc took her side. I know I had my failings, failings which to me could be made right given some time. But not to her, someone who thinks alot about things and usually makes negative assumptions on them, as much as I had tried to inject some positivity to her.

I am totally broken now. She has blocked me on social media. She now has her colleagues and friends' support. I don't really have any.

I really don't know what to do. My entire life revolved around her. There's nothing in my life except working, eating and sleeping now. Almost everything that I see and use are related to her in some way.

I NEED HELP. PLEASE HELP.



When you have position your entire life around a transitory figure, naturally, you are bound to be on the road to emotional destruction. It is not the risky preposition you have adopted in an absolute sense, but rather, the concept of giving yourself up (inclusive of your personal self worth) has a drastic reduction of social value, which she would often transform you into 'something else' other than the guy she first knew.

When you play the role of a boyfriend, you must understand that that is not a nurse, maid or personal assistant; the intensity of your love & care might come across as potentially choking.

Though it may appear that your writings seemed to suggest that you are more positive, subconsciously, you are likely to be negative (probably similar or worst). The seeming positive facade is somewhat ingeniously masks through overcompensating care and concern while the real insecurity nest within the core. If you were to be bluntly honest to yourself, you might actually realize that probably you care more about having to accomplish the final step to your next phase of life instead of your ex-gf per se.

Your post does not reveal anything about your stated 'failings', other than a string of narcissistic perception. Perhaps, you could post - not what you have done for her - but her chief considerations to call it quit. The picture would then be clearer.

P.S: You might have lost the relationship, but you could still keep those lessons.

Cheers